June 29, 2016

It’s opening night at TRIC and things are gon’ git crazy in the hizzouse! What?

Yeah, so TRIC is opening and it’s going to start with the much talked about All Ages Night.

I’m tipsy so we’re doing a Top 10 List of IMPORTANT Events…In no particular order…

1.  TRIC is opening! Peyton is nervous she didn’t do enough to promote it. She totes did enough as most of Tree Hill High shows up along with adult people we know. Karen has no real worries as she can just pawn any failure off on Peyton who has done all the leg work to get a band. We know the music is the most important thing. Sure, Karen had to worry about getting the bar stocked and permits and loans and vendors, and all kinds of other stuff in like 3 days, but that’s boring. The only thing that is of any entertainment value is Peyton getting some live music. She goes to visit with Chris Keller at the record store to see if he’ll perform. She almost doesn’t but he says it must be important since she came early in the morning on school day. Ummm, Chris, I’m pretty sure their school starts at Noon or hardly ever. He hands her a rider. She’s disgusted by it, but she gets everything on the list.

2. Brooke starts collecting money for the needy. Peyton and Haley are all, Wha? The money is for Brooke and they are appalledsauce. Haley offers to take her shopping on a budget. They go bargain shopping for a dress for the club opening. Brooke finds some stuff, but she spends the whole time insulting everything about where they are and the quality of what they’re buying. She must get sad face everytime she sees Haley. Poor Haley.

3. Haley is nervous about performing at TRIC. Everyone spends the episode telling her she’s going to do great. She actually backs out when she gets to the club. Peyton is bumsauced. Chris Keller introduces Nathan to him. He also doesn’t think their marriage will work. He tells Haley that he heard she’s not performing and implies she let him down or something. Innyway, he shames her and she is sad she disappointed him. LAyer Chris Keller is introduced to the stage and he looks around the room and everyone is just talking. He’s not playing any music so I’m a little confused as to why he thought they’d stop talking. He tells them they’re not ready for him and walks off the stage. Everybody boos. He walks by Haley and she’s all, What the hey? And he tells her that it’s not his problem, but it’s not as bad as being screwed over by a friend. Haley is all, Gosh he got me. Then Haley goes up and performs her sad ballad. Everybody is supes impressed. Again, it’s not my favorite song of hers. Innyway, Chris Keller implies to Peyton that he did what he did to get Haley on the stage. After Haley is such a raging success from one really depressing piano ballad, THUD magazine wants to interview her.

4. Dan goes to visit Karen at the Cafe to tell her how sorry he is for everything horrible he’s ever done to her. You can tell these two still take each other’s bref away. Well, that’s my head cannon. Karen tells him he’s freaking everybody out and nobody buys his new outlook on life. He’s all, Sorry you feel that way. By the way I notice Keith not around, but just so you know, I’ve forgiven him for sleeping with my wife. Karen is all, Whaaat? Dan’s all, Oh, you didn’t know? Dan, that SOB. At the end of opening night, Karen asks Deb about it and Deb is all, LIES. Karen believes her. SUCKER!

5. Andy has tshirts made with the club’s logo for merchandise. He gives Karen one for little Lucas. He thinks Lucas is like 7. She doesn’t correct him. At the club she sees them talking to each other about bands no one has ever heard of and finally has to come clean. Lucas was about to figure it out because Andy was telling him that the owner is his girlfriend. Lucas is all, Peyton? No, Lucas, Peyton does not own or run TRIC! Andy’s all, Um, I’d like to NOT get arrested for statutory rape. Karen walks up and says Lucas is her son. Andy is all, Oh. Andy confronts her later on the subject. She says their age difference matters to her. Meanwhile, it’s nowhere in the vicinity of an issue between Keith and Jules and Jules is probably younger than Andy! Ugh. Andy turns the two of them to the bar mirror and is all, I don’t see a problem, I see two smokin’ hotties who are smokin’ hot. They kissy kiss.

6. Nathan visits Whitey at the hospital. He tells Whitey that he turned down High Flyers. He says that he wants Haley to have her time to shine or some such. He’s full of crap. But Whitey says he’s mature or something. Whatever, I know the future, he’s not ready to make a decision like this, especially one based on a lie he told his wife! Later on after the opening he’ll be lying awake in bed tossing a basketball in the air. He’ll look over at the clock to see that it’s 2:38 AM and Haley’s still not home. Make of that what you will.

7. Face Part, Felix and Anna do stuff in this episode. However, since ultimately, Anna and Felix don’t really matter and they aren’t Core, whatever. Let’s just say that Felix won’t last much longer and Anna isn’t for Lucas so all of the drama over her and Lucas and Felix’s feelings about them together is moot. Felix is probably more annoying than Face Part. Felix is definitely more despicable than anyone we’ll ever meet on this show.

8. Jules is a whore. Sounds harsh, I know, but ultimately accurate. And I just want to throw it out there, Poor Theresa.

9. Brooke is still a mean drunk.

10. Haley and Peyton are gearing up to leave after everything is shut down. Peyton looks in the backroom for any stragglers. She finds Pusher Man and his friends doing lines. That is A LOT of cocaine on the table. He says hey to Peyton and tells his friends to relax that Peyton’s cool, they just did a line last week. Haley is not impressed.

Uuuh, sthorry.