June 30, 2016

We open with a Brooke voiceover. Fancy! She’s house hopping with Felix and when they get back to her house they discover that she no longer has a bed. A note’s been left to say that they got a good price on her queen and a single is on the way. Poor Brooke, they sold her bed ūüė¶ She tells Felix, party’s over, she’s gotta go meet Haley anyway. Why?

To sell some CDs at the record store! Brooke’s never had to sell her junk before so Haley explains to her how it works. Brooke hopes she can get enough to buy her bed back.¬†Um, no. Before they go in, Brooke decides she wants to have a slumber party at Haley’s. Nathan and Lucas are going to Charlotte to see an NBA game and won’t be back until the next day so she thinks it will be fun. Haley’s not so sure, she’s never been to one because she was never popular enough to be invited or host. Brooke is confused how Haley ever learned to do her hair and makeup, or kiss boys or whatever. Brooke, Haley never learned how to do any of those things…until she met Nathan. Haley’s hesitant to say yes because she was looking forward to an empty apartment, but Brooke insists. Chris Keller looks in the crate of CDs and deems them all crap, but that’s ok because he says crap sells. So, Brooke might get a decent take, but definitley not enough to buy a bed…maybe lunch. Chris Keller asks Haley if she’s heard his demo. She says yes. He says he knows it’s great that he wants her to come lay down some tracks on another song he’s recording. Brooke is all, Lay? He says he meant record some vocals. Brooke’s all, I know what you meant. She totes can tell that Chris Keller is up to no good and poor pure innocent Haley won’t realize it until it’s too late! He wants her to come to the studio tonight. Haley says yes and he walks away. Brooke is all we already have plans! Haley says she’ll be there after she records. Brooke says ok, she’ll get there early to set up . Haley is confused as to what there could be to set up. Brooke is all, Just trust me. Haley spends most of her time confused when she hangs out with Brooke.

Ew, Keith and Jules. This is the freaking worst. I can’t even. I know Keith’s a loser, but he doesn’t deserve this.

Meanwhile at TRIC, Peyton is fussing ¬†around with some CDs. Karen walks in and Peyton tells her she looks beat. Ruuuude! Karen says she pulled an all nighter writing a paper. This is IMPORTANT. She tells Peyton to go home and get some rest, but first she wants to talk to her. She tells Peyton that Haley told her about the drugs. Haley. I would’ve loved to see that conversation. Peyton tries to play it cool. Karen is all, Yeah, I won’t have that at my club, so next time that happens let me know. She doesn’t expect Peyton to handle everything so she wants Peyton to know she’s not a scary witch lady and Peyton can talk to her. She makes Peyton promise that she’ll come talk to her and let her know when things like that happen. Peyton promises. She’s a liar though because we all know Peyton loves her secrets and now she’s probably plotting Haley’s death. Well, get in line Peyton, get in line.

Brooke and Haley meet up with Lucas and Nathan in the parking lot of the apartment. Lucas has just finished a tune up on Nathan’s car that they’ve been working on together. Haley and Nathan do the lovey dovey thing and Lucas is all, Ok, it’s time to go. Nathan is all, Hey, it’s our fist night apart since we got married. Brooke says the girls are having a slumber party and Haley still looks kinda bummed about it. You should be Haley, you should be, slumber parties are the WORST. Nathan is glad she won’t be alone, but wonders what she’ll do with her day until then. Haley says she’ll be hanging out with Brooke, right Brooke? Nathan and Haley’s lies will catch up to them. Kids. Brooke goes along with it, but knows Haley has now entered the realm of up to no good.

Anna helps Peyton clean up from the night before at TRIC. Brooke calls Peyton and is a bit offended that Anna is there and Peyton didn’t call her to go help. Peyton reminds Brooke that’s not how she wants to spend her Saturday. Brooke says they’re having a slumber party and Peyton wants to invite Anna. Ugh.

Lucas and Nathan are on the road and having bro talk. They’re admiring their work on the car. Nathan mentions that they still need to replace the tape deck. Lucas has his iPod and cassette adapter. They are disappointed to find there’s already a tape in the machine and it’s stuck! They play it and it’s a very strange song about being on holiday. It’s pretty funny. The same kind of thing happened in Season 2 of How I Met Your Mother. These shows are getting more and more similar! Haha.

Karen is running her paper up to Andy as he’s leaving the school building. He’s happy because he thought he’d have to fail her. He says she looks flushed. Ruuuude! She says she ran all the way from the parking lot, plus she’s a little nervous about the paper…and you know…she looks around and then gives him a peck on the cheek. He thinks she’s supes adorbs! He asks her to dinner and says they’re passed the hot dog stage. Karen’s all, I floved the hot dog stage! He says, Yeah, that’s why I wanna be with you forever and ever amen. Too soon? He says it’s time for an upgrade from the hot dog stage. Karen’s game.

Ew, Keith and Jules. This is the freaking worst. I can’t even. I know Keith’s a loser, but he doesn’t deserve this.

Peyton and Anna show up at the apartment to find the door is ajar and stuff is thrown over inside. They assume there’s something amiss, so they grab a bat to investigate. Peyton yells out that they have a bat and Anna calls out that they’ve called 911. Peyton looks at Anna like, Does that number work now? They tip toe to the bedroom and open the door to find Felix and Brooke. They scream and Anna is squicked.

Pusher Man comes to see Karen at TRIC. She’s summoned him. She tells him that he’s no longer welcome at TRIC and to stay away. He says she’s making a big mistake since he controls most of the bands on the circuit. Karen says they’ll manage. It’s like dude, do your drugs SOMEWHERE ELSE! Does he really have to be at the club just because one of the bands he promotes is playing? Just go somewhere else. But obvy he just wants to give free drugs to kids, which makes him a real weirdo Jerkface.

Peyton is pretty upset with Brooke for doing it with Felix in Haley’s bed. Brooke didn’t know where else to go, she doesn’t have a bed at home. Peyton is all, You’ve never had a problem finding alternative locations before! She tells her to wash the sheets. Brooke’s all, No duh. Anna is present and Brooke’s rude to her. Felix comes out and is stoopid. Brooke says he has to go now and he goes back to get his stuff, but gets in the shower first. The girls are all, Whaaa?

Haley is recording a song with Chris Keller. She has no studio experience and she really sucks at it at first. The song is When the Stars Go Blue by Ryan Adams.¬†¬†This song will haunt you for the rest of your life, definitely for a big chunk of the season! Back at the apartment Peyton is appalled that Felix is still in the shower! Haley finally gets to the apartment and Peyton asks where she’s been. She says nowhere she’s just going to take a quick shower. She runs back to the kitchen screaming and mortified. Felix walks out and is stoopid.

Karen is late to their date, but he’s all, No worries.¬†Ew, Keith and Jules. This is the freaking worst. I can’t even. I know Keith’s a loser, but he doesn’t deserve this. Andy notices Karen’s reaction to Keith being there with another lady, but he’s not going to let it stop him. Meanwhile in Charlotte, we go and watch a basketball game and some bro time with Nathan and Lucas.

Meanwhile back at the apartment, the girls are putting on face masks and doing beauty stuff. Actually, Haley is the only one that has stuff all over her face. Typical. Innyway, she’s confused (again, Brooke’s around) because they have her thinking that the shower is not working at Felix’s house. Haley’s confused that he would drive so far out of the way to her apartment. She then remembers that Brooke doesn’t have a bed and comes to the conclusion on her own that Brooke and Felix did it in her bed. She is totes squicked. Brooke ¬†says she’s washing the sheets and she’s already been yelled at about it. Haley starts in on Brooke because Brooke didn’t thank her for the CD selling help, she did it in her bed, and she ate all the brownies! Anna says she ate a couple. Haley snaps that that’s not the point. That is curious though as the only person you really ever see actually eat on camera is Haley. Interesting…Innyway, Brooke turns it back on Haley saying at least she’s not being deceptive or whatever. And I’m like, But you totes just tried to be a bit ago. So silly, Brooke. Peyton is confused now. She keeps wanting to know what it is Haley lied about and where she was. Haley then turns things on Peyton saying if you want to talk to someone who has shown poor judgement talk to Peyton. This upsets Peyton! Brooke then says what did Peyton do? She’s not the one acting. Anna asks why they’re being mean to Haley she’s throwing them a slumber party. Brooke then turns things on Anna saying that she’s throwing them a slumber party, not Anna. Peyton then yells at Brooke. Haley then lays into Brooke some more saying that Brooke threw the slumber party for herself, Haley didn’t. Brooke then says at least she didn’t lie to her husband about going to see Chris. Which prompts Haley to say that Peyton did cocaine. Which causes Brooke to be appalled and call Peyton a crack whore. Peyton calls her a slut. Brooke calls Haley a liar. Haley pulls the nose ¬†sticky off of Brooke. Peyton screams. They all have upset face. Anna giggles and says Tree Hill has some drama. Shut up, Anna. Why are you even there?!

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Over in Charlotte the boys have really enjoyed the game! Lucas says he could no probs drive them back home he’s so wired. Nathan says no, they have to stay because HCM is genetic and there’s a free test in Charlotte once a month for student athletes. The odds are 50/50 (1 in 2) of either one of them having HCM. They get to meet one of the basketball players. He signs a jersey and chats with them a little. He tells them they need to bulk up if they wanna be in the league. They are a bit scrawny and a tad on the short side for the NBA. SPOILER ALERT: Nathan bulks up for sure.

Andy and Karen are back at his place. Karen apologizes for dinner. He says no worries. Karen states that Keith was not her boyfriend. Andy is all, But he proposed. They look at a painting and Karen says she has the same print and Andy says, It ain’t a print, baby. Karen is impressed. He has a house in Italy, too! Karen yawns. He thinks he’s boring. She says no, she took all night to write her paper. He says oh, goes to get the paper and puts a big fat A on it. He hands it to Karen. He thinks nothing of any of this, but Karen is deeply offended and leaves in a huff.

Back at the apartment all the girls are still there but not talking to each other. They apologize to each other and friend talk. Now, this is totally an accurate portrayal of slumber parties. Everyone always fights, but nobody ever leaves, and then later everyone talks it out and it’s all ok. Slumber parties are a lot of hard work! Innyway, Haley doesn’t know why she lied to Nathan. Peyton asks if she has feelings for Chris. Haley says no, she just feels embarrassed about knowing what she wants and knowing that Chris is the one that can help her get it. Her music stuff. Gosh guys, head out of the gutter! She says Nathan never apologizes or lies for what he wants so she doesn’t know why she felt like she had to lie. Haley, he totally lies. Y’all have both perpetrated the same crime against each other. Brooke says Haley can go for what she wants and still be a girl. Then they move onto Peyton. Haley apologizes to Peyton for blurting out her secret, she just didn’t know how to handle that situation. Peyton says she just wants them to all be good enough friends that they aren’t afraid to talk to each other especially when it’s about something ugly. She and Brooke hold hands.¬†Later they start discussing Brooke’s FWB sitch with Felix. Anna doesn’t want to do that. Go away! Peyton doesn’t agree with FWB. Haley doesn’t either. Then Anna turns it into a girl power PSA. It’s all well and good, but I still want her to skedaddle.

Karen is back at Casa de Squints. Andy calls her, but the call is coming from outside the house! She lets him in and he has the paper with him. She is mad at him because she thinks he didn’t read it. He says he did. She thinks he should know it doesn’t deserve an A, it’s just a first draft. He says it’s good and she’s already successful and he can have another colleague grade it, but he believes the result will be the same. He says that maybe running a successful business and raising a son has prepared her in ways she doesn’t recognize. He wants her to have more confidence in herself and in him. She’s all, Sexytimes! And off they go.

Ew, Keith and Jules. This is the freaking worst. I can’t even. I know Keith’s a loser, but he doesn’t deserve this.

They are eating ice cream. Haley is done with the sob fest and she starts a pillow fight. Feathers!

Lucas and Nathan are at their hotel. Lucas is worried about Haley and how she feels about all this. Nathan hasn’t told her about the test or the HCM possibility. Shocker! He thinks it’s protecting her and he’s going to wait for the results before he tells her anything. The next morning, Nathan is first on the testing table. He asks Lucas how he is. Lucas doesn’t want to give up basketball so he’d rather not know. Nathan said he felt the same way about basketball, but now he has Haley and his priorities changed. Nathan is about to get tested when Lucas says, Yeah, no, not gonna do it. They are back on the road and Nathan is not happy with Lucas’s decision. Lucas gets deep about life and death and Nathan stops talking in order to process.

Karen and Andy. Geezer love. We see them flirt and stuff when they wake up in the morning. She really does have a print of that painting over her bed. Ha!

Ew, Keith and Jules. This is the freaking worst. I can’t even. I know Keith’s a loser, but he doesn’t deserve this.

Brooke is eating ice cream for breakfast Haley wakes up and Brooke gives her some ice cream. Apparently they didn’t eat any actual food lastnight! Haley is covered in feathers. Of course Haley wakes up looking all a mess. Out on the balcony Anna tells Peyton that she had a good time and if she ever wants to talk…Brooke and Haley come out onto the balcony. Brooke apologizes to Anna for being so rude and says she’s totes part of the group. They all giggle and laugh.

Lucas and Nathan are still on the road. Lucas asks Nathan not to tell Karen and Haley that he didn’t take the test. Then they sing along to the holiday song stuck in the tape deck. It’s funny!

Brooke and Peyton go to Gloom Town. Peyton checks her messages and there’s one from Pusher Man.

Haley is listening to the track she recorded last night. We see her memory of recording with Chris. Ooookay. Nathan walks in and she closes the laptop. He wonders what that was and she tells him that it’s a work in progress and she’s not ready for him to hear it yet. They hug and kiss and all that jazz and then both give I have a secret face.

Music Video Time! Lucas goes home and hears his mom and Andy flirting in the bedroom. Ew.¬†Felix and Anna talk. Anna tells him he caused a lot of problems last night and she doesn’t like it when he does stuff like this. She likes them and she doesn’t like how he treats Brooke. He says he does care about Brooke for reals, but it’s against the rules and he doesn’t know what to do. Blargh. Brooke goes home and her single bed is there, but they couldn’t even put the sheets on for her?! She lays down on her tiny bed. Sad face. Lucas is shooting hoops at the River Court.¬†Nathan comes up and says he got the test results back and he’s HCM free. Lucas is all, 1 in 2, right? They have bro talk. Roll credits.

Episode Notes:
PLOT: The girls have a slumber party.

BEST PART:¬†When the three girls spill all of their secrets and call each other names. It’s really well done. All of the slumber party stuff is entertaining.

LESSON LEARNED: Honesty is the best policy.

BEST LINE: ‚ÄúWhat are you gonna do, snort her?‚ÄĚ ‚Äď Haley James¬†Scott to Peyton Sawyer¬†Hahaha!

Until next time…tooda loos!

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