July 21, 2016

The local news reports on the Midnight Madness brawl and Whitey is not happy with the boys so he makes them run and run and run.

Over at Casa de Scott, Dan is peeing in the pool because Deb clogged the toilet on his side of the house. Deb is going for a swim and has no idea what he just did. Whatever, there are so many chemicals in pools.

At school, Haley is hiding behind a column. Why? Oh, to “accidentally” bump into Nathan. Ugh, I’m really annoyed by Nathan at this point. She doesn’t know why Lucas and Nathan were fighting at Midnight Madness, but she wishes things were back to the way they used to be. Nathan tells her they are. Blargh. She meant how they were before she left. Nathan asks her why she’s a cheerleader. She tells him that Brooke needed her help and she gets to see more of Nathan as a bonus. She asks if it’s ok with him even though she doesn’t need his permission. She’s not snotty about it, just wondering. Nathan says she doesn’t and she also doesn’t need to pretend to bump into him, he doesn’t want to play games. He’s a dum dum. Haley brings up the game he’s playing with her and Chris. He’s all, Oh, yeah, that’s right. He asks how it’s going. She says it’s going ok. He says not to sleep on her music, it’s a big part of who she is. Then he just zooms off, leaving her all alone. She sad face says, “So are you.”

Brooke is telling Peyton about how much she can’t stand Rachel. Peyton says that Brooke is the one keeping the arrangement with Lucas nonexclusive. Oh look, it’s Lucas putting up flyers for Fantasy Basketball. Does he get any takers or does it ever come up again, don’t thinks so. This is like a Saved by the Bell moment. He doings something strictly for the sole purpose of eliciting a lightbulb idea for Brooke. She tells him that she does have feelings for him. He says he wants to be the guy for her that she wants him to be but he has to let her. Sense. She asks, so he explains what a Fantasy draft is. When they walk into the hallway of the school, Bevin is having an argument about a boy with another girl. It quickly escalates to physical violence. Whitey witnesses this and goes to break it up. Brooke says she can handle them and he doesn’t seem to agree. He says that he and the principal had a chat and decided that another fight like Midnight Madness would be the end of the cheer squad. Whaaaa? Do they plan on ending basketball because those guys get into fisticuffs ALLLLLLL THE TIME!! Ugh, double standards exist in full force in OTH Town.

Brooke immediately calls a squad meeting. Conveniently, there is an empty room and they are all excused from first period, I guess. Brooke says she’s not about to lose the squad because of fights over boys. She proposes a Fantasy Boy Draft. Everyone gives I don’t really know how to react to such ridiculousness face.

The girls are in their locker room and Brooke is passing out little compacts that have numbers written on the mirror to determine draft order. Just go with it. She states the rules saying that the boy the girl picks is off the market for everyone else for the entire season. The consequences for breaking the rules could mean expulsion from the team and/or social suicide by way of all the dirt Brooke has on all of them. Brooke says people are allowed to trade. Peyton is 1, Brooke 2, Bevin 3, Haley 4.

Deb and Karen are at the Cafe laughing about clowning Dan. They are having a good time. Karen shows Deb her new campaign posters. They go to hang one on the window when up drives a giant billboard truck for Dan’s campaign. He has it parked right in front of the cafe. Dan’s such a jerk.

So much stuff happens. Like Rachel trying to move in and be Brooke. Whatever, Rachel’s gross. Peyton works on a sketch the whole episode and she wears the cancer bracelet Ellie left behind. Peyton is still awful to Haley even though it’s like whatever. To prepare for their draft, the girls follow around various guys and the guys vie for their attention. Face Part wants to be considered too. Ugh. Bevin follows Skills around and he notices. Haley walks in late to work and right away tells Lucas how she was researching his meds and that a side effect is sluggishness. She thinks he should talk to Whitey. Lucas is like, No. She says he better or she will! Later she is using a label maker to type out names of great musicians and putting the label on a map in the area the artist was from or whatever. Chris walks in and they talk cheesey about music. He’s trying to get her to write better songs by actually acknowledging that her marriage is not doing so well. He makes a label for her and puts it on the map under Tree Hill. YEAH RIGHT!

Dan picks on Karen all episode, even goes to Lucas at practice and says to tell Karen to drop  out of the race. He visits her at the Cafe, but he can’t finish being a jerk because Deb laced his coffee with the squirts.

Nathan and Peyton talk in the hall. He mentions that he heard her podcast and that she’s not alone. Nathan, shut up! He’s not sure how he feels about Haley possibly picking him in the draft so Peyton says she’ll pick him.

Lucas goes to Whitey and instead of telling him everything he decides to just say that he’s out of shape and the team shouldn’t be punished for her failure to keep up anymore. Whitey’s all, No worries. Of course, at practice Whitey says that Co-Captain Lucas thinks he’s riding them too hard. He makes Lucas sit on the bleachers and then makes all of the other guys run and run and run. Down a ways to where the cheerleaders are, Haley sees Lucas and is immediately annoyed that he obvy didn’t tell Whitey. Bevin asks Haley how things are with Nathan. Haley says she’s not giving up on them. Bevin breaks the news to the girls that Nathan is a no go. Peyton walks up and says yeah because she plans on picking him. Haley is not happy with this news. Seriously, she doesn’t deserve the treatment she’s getting. Meanwhile, Rachel has Brooke convinced that she’s going to pick Chris Keller. She’s met Brooke and knows how easy it is.

Peyton pulls Brooke away from Rachel’s general vicinity to keep her out of trouble. They talk about the Fantasy Draft and Brooke says Peyton can’t choose Nathan. She thinks it’s bad stuff since he’s MARRIED. It really is though considering what the rules are! Peyton says she’s going to because Haley and her own Peytony reasons. hPeyton says she could choose Lucas and Brooke goes along with going ahead and having her pick Nathan.

Haley confronts Lucas in the hall and is about to go tell Whitey when he starts quoting a a poem to her. She gets all, Whaaa? He says it’s Invictus which means invincible, she cuts him off because she’s not confused by the reference to the poem, she’s confused as to Lucas thinks he can relate. She tells him that he’s not invincible. She’s upset because he could die and she has to explain how medication works and she huffs off. He slams his locker.

It’s Fantasy Boy Draft time! Face Part is outside the apartment being annoying the whole time. Ugh. Haley goes up to Peyton and says she can’t stop her from drafting Nathan, but it’s a waste of time because she’s not going anywhere. Peyton just stares at her and kind of smiles. Rachel happens and she’s just like awful. Brooke tells Haley that she’s going to snipe Rachel’s pick and wants Haley to choose Lucas. Haley agrees to help Brooke.

Nathan goes to the studio to give Chris cash for the time. Chris tells him the story of Rober Johnson and likens Nathan to the devil in the story. Chris says something that prompts Nathan to say he’s there to talk about Haley and her music not Haley and him. Chris informs him that Haley and music and Haley and Nathan are the same thing. Dum dum’s mind is blown!

Lucas and Karen are eating dinner at the Cafe. They talk about the election and she tells him about hard work and sometimes you have to work harder. She has no idea what she’s done! Lucas heads out to work a little harder.

Back at the apartment, Peyton picks Face Part. Haley wants to tell Brooke she’ll be picking Nathan now, but Brooke is blinded by thinking she’s about to stick it to Rachel she doesn’t listen. Brooke picks Chris only to be surprised that Bevin and Rachel traded positions and Rachel is now third and pics Lucas. It all goes quickly from there and Haley does pick Nathan. The whole draft works out for everyone except Brooke and it all her damn vault! She wants to be mad at doofus Bevin and nasty Rachel, but really she can only be mad at herself. Haley thanks Peyton for not picking Nathan. Peyton says it was because Haley finally started to fight for her husband. Whaaa? That’s all Haley’s been doing since she got back to Tree Hill! Peyton, you have no idea what you’re talking about! Go find Jake and shut up together!!!!

Karen and Deb are hanging out at the Cafe when on comes a negative TV ad about Karen. It has footage of her throwing the chair into Dan’s window. She decides they need to go negative on Dan too.

Epic Music Video Time! Lucas’s voiceover is reciting the Invictus poem. Lucas is in the gym running lines trying to beat a timer. He’s not doing great. Karen and Deb have Dan’s billboard truck hauled off. Brooke is sad while officially typing up the draft results. Peyton finishes her new sketch for her Where Are They Now Wall.


Haley puts Scott at the end of her name on map. We see Nathan in the locker room give a look like he’s realizing what a dum dum he is. Lucas is running and running still about to not make it before the buzzer again as the voiceover says “I am the master of my fate. I am the captain of my soul.” Roll credits.

Run, Lucas, Run!

Until next time…tooda loos!